


Eeny, Meeny, Miny, Moe

by weardodo



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M, first 'real' kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-21
Updated: 2013-07-21
Packaged: 2017-12-20 22:49:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/892816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weardodo/pseuds/weardodo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles just wants to be groped.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Eeny, Meeny, Miny, Moe

**Author's Note:**

> ...this just popped up in my head again, so yeah... don't ask... ^^
> 
> Stiles' POV
> 
> Not Beta'd, English is still not my native language, all mistakes are mine.

                                                                       

 

_Eeny, meeny, miny, moe,_

_Catch a tiger by the toe._

_If he hollers, let him go,_

_Eeny, meeny, miny, moe._

 

 

It wasn’t that he hadn’t kissed anyone before. He had. No seriously he had!

 

_Shut up._

 

It’s just that he never really _really_ kissed anyone before, like _kiss_ kiss. You know, with excessive tongue and the usual groping and obscene noise-making that people always seemed to do while going at it.

 

Well, at least that’s what the tv says anyways… and the internet… and everybody else around him…

 

_God he was pathetic._

 

But no more! Nope, this was going to end right now! No more Mr. Never-Been-Kissed Stiles!

 

All he had to do was find the right guy, simple as that. Yes ‘guy’, he wants his first real kiss **/** groping **/** obscene-noisemaking to be with a guy. He _needs_ it to be with a guy, for _um_ ‘personal reasons’.

 

Simple. He knows lots of guys. In fact, he really had that guy-friend swag going on, oodles of guys. Tons.  Easy peasy. _Finding a guy, easy as pie, haha!_

 

Okay, so he was basically screwed.

 

There had to be _someone_ out there willing to put his hands on Stiles, though. Right?

 

The next pack-meeting, Stiles came prepared. _Mentally_ prepared that is. All he had to do was go over every guy in the room and start crossing people off until the best and most suitable candidate remains.

 

Basically it’s just a matter of _eeny, meeny, miny, moe_ … only with werewolves instead of tigers… and without any toe-catching… Okay, so maybe that analogy sucks, but that’s not the point.

 

Scott was out of the question. He’d probably do it though, to help out his best friend. But no, just no. It would be like kissing his brother, totally weird. And plus, they already did it once in 5th grade, just to see what it would be like. The _kissing_ part, not the groping and moaning part! _Oh my god… Just no._

 

Scott was definitely out of the question.

 

Isaac would be a good candidate… If it wasn’t for the unsubtle fact that he was currently tiptoeing in the ménage-à-trois waters with Scott and Allison. _Lucky bastard_ s.

 

So yeah, Isaac was out too.

 

Derek? Well, that body definitely scored a 10 on the Stilinski-scale of Absurd Hotness, and he would be lying if he’d say Derek wasn’t filed in his mental file-cabinet of spank-bank material. Alas, it took just one of Derek’s death-glares to snap him out of that illusion. Stiles seriously wondered if the guy had somehow permanently tattooed those eyebrows on there to look murderously all the time or if he just reserved that specific expression especially for him. _Probably the latter_. So nope. Unless he had a sudden glaring death-wish. Plus, wasn’t he fucking that teacher-lady?

 

Okay, yeah, Derek, definitely a _no go_.

 

Chris… What the fuck was that guy doing here anyway? Oh well, never look a gift horse in the mouth. _Or a werewolf-hunter for that matter._  After all, he is a guy and he ís currently in the room, so basically he met the job-requirements. Hm… and to be honest, someone with a little experience would be nice. What’s that saying again about learning how to drive in a used car? Is there even a saying that says that? There should definitely be a saying that says that. But okay, that’s beside the point. Chris is pretty hot, so there’s that. But he’d probably get killed if he tried to stick his tongue down the man’s throat. If not by Chris himself, than most likely by one of Allison’s arrows.

 

Yup, scratch Chris, no go on the DILF.

 

That leaves… crap.

 

Peter.

 

He did look good though. Like _really_ good. Like ‘hey I inherited the Hale-gene of Fucking-Perfect and look at me being all insanely hot’ good. Ánd he always treated Stiles in a weird-ass ‘come-sit-on-Uncle-Peter’s-lap-and-I’ll-give-you-some-candy’ kind of way. Which should be totally creepy. Like _mayor fucking_ creepy. And it was. It _is_. Creepy. Really creepy in a creeper McCreeperson way.

 

And also really hot.

 

_Oh what the hell_ , Stiles thought as marched over to Peter and jumped him without giving it any further thought.

 

 

Peter walked out with Stiles’ legs wrapped around his waist and his hands cupping Stiles’s ass.

 

There was definitely excessive-tongue **_slash_** groping **_slash_** obscene-noisemaking going on.

 

                 

                                                                                             - FIN -

 

 


End file.
